What to Expect from Counselling - and Some Common Fears Explained

Introduction

Have you ever thought about counselling but not quite managed to take the first step? Maybe you’re unsure what to expect, or wonder whether your issues are “significant enough.” Perhaps you feel uncomfortable opening up to a stranger, or fear being judged.

In this post, I’ll share what you can expect from counselling with me and address some of the most common worries people have when they’re starting therapy.

Starting Counselling

It can feel nerve-wracking to begin counselling. There are so many counsellors out there — all with different training and life experiences — that just finding the “right” one can feel overwhelming!

Once you’ve narrowed it down and gotten in touch, what happens next?

In my practice, I offer a free introductory call, which is a chance for us to “break the ice” and find out a bit more about each other. If you’d prefer to go straight ahead and book an initial session, that’s absolutely fine too.

What Happens in the Initial Session

Before your first session, I’ll ask you to complete a short online form with some basic details — such as your name, contact information, GP, and emergency contact. This helps save admin time when we meet.

You’ll also receive a copy of my therapy agreement along with information about payment, location, and parking, so you feel fully prepared.

During the first session, we’ll go through the therapy agreement together to ensure everything is clear. I’ll always give you space to ask questions or raise any concerns.

The rest of the session is for you — to explore your needs and discuss how counselling might help.

Common Fears About Counselling

Below are some of the most common worries people share when starting out:

1. Fear of Being Judged

Many people worry that a counsellor will think poorly of them, their choices, or their past. My training, personal therapy, and life experiences help me to offer empathy and understanding. I believe we are all the product of our experiences — doing our best with the cards we’ve been dealt — and that nothing is black and white.

2. Not Knowing What to Say

It’s common to worry about sitting in silence or not knowing what to talk about. Taking up space in the counselling room can feel unfamiliar, especially if you haven’t had that space elsewhere in life. I do my best to put clients at ease and, if I sense you’re struggling, I can gently take the lead to lift that pressure.

3. Opening Up Too Much or Losing Control

Being vulnerable can be scary. Some clients fear they’ll lose control of their emotions or say something they’ll later regret.

That’s okay — we’re in this together. If emotions become overwhelming, I’ll help you regulate. If you share too much, I can help slow things down and reassure you that everything remains confidential (unless someone is at risk of serious harm).

4. Stigma and Shame

Some people worry about what others might think if they find out they’re in counselling. Thankfully, mental health is talked about much more openly these days — but I understand that many clients prefer privacy.

I’ll always discuss safe ways to communicate between sessions, and if I see you in public, I won’t acknowledge you unless you acknowledge me first.

5. Cost and Commitment

There’s no set amount of time needed for counselling — it might last weeks or years depending on your needs. Affordability is often a concern, so I try to be as flexible as possible.

Regular sessions are important, but I can also offer fortnightly sessions or shorter-term work with breaks in between to make counselling more manageable.

6. Fear That Counselling Won’t Help

Some people wonder whether talking will actually make a difference, or if their problems are “too big.” I believe that in most cases, talking therapy can help lessen distress. I’ve experienced for myself how transformative it can be to feel heard and validated in a non-judgmental space — which is why I retrained as a counsellor.

If a client’s needs are beyond my scope, I’ll be open about that and help them find the right support.

7. Not Connecting with the Counsellor

Clients sometimes worry they won’t “click” with their counsellor. I believe that the relationship between client and counsellor is the most important factor in effective therapy.

I do my best to help you feel comfortable and understood. However, I also recognise that my style won’t suit everyone — and that’s okay. If it doesn’t feel like the right fit, I’ll always encourage you to try someone else.

8. Confidentiality Worries

It’s normal to feel anxious about privacy, especially in smaller communities. At the start of our work, I’ll explain exactly how confidentiality works — including the few legal and safeguarding exceptions — and how your information is securely stored.

Professional counsellors are bound by ethical guidelines that protect your privacy.

9. Self-Doubt

Some people question whether they even “deserve” counselling or if they’re wasting the counsellor’s time.

My view is simple: if something is causing distress or affecting your life, it’s worth exploring.

I spent years wondering if my issues were “big enough” for counselling — and it turned out to be one of the best decisions I ever made.

Final Thoughts

Starting counselling can feel daunting, but you don’t have to face that uncertainty alone. The first step is often the hardest — but it can also be the most rewarding.

If any of these points resonate with you, feel free to get in touch for a free introductory call. I’d be happy to answer any questions and help you decide if counselling might be right for you.